During the month of February, we are excited to profile a different couple each day on our Blog site. We have asked each couple to share their answers to specific questions concerning marriage and family. The couples we have invited are at different stages in their marriage… Some have been married for decades while others for a few years. There are even couples who are separated with hopes of reconciling as well as couples currently experiencing a challenging time in their marriage. The one thing all of these couples have in common is their willingness to share “real” insights to help strengthen other marriages, families, and those desiring to be married.
Marriages are NOT all perfect and just because there are challenges doesn’t mean it cannot evolve into a GREAT marriage. Challenges = Growth Opportunities.
Our intention is to create more realistic depictions of marriage…the “real” deal and what it takes to make a marriage work. As you will realize by reading these couples’ insights, GREAT marriages don’t just happen. They take conscious effort and continuous work.
So let us learn from their wisdom. Feel free to chime in and ask questions or even just share your thoughts. After reading today’s insights, post your comment to the question: “What did I learn from today’s insights?” Let’s continue sharing insights. It is our desire to create a dialog so we all learn from others’ experiences and mistakes because this will help create more healthier marriages and families. Join the movement!
Let’s now read some insights from Reggie and Pam Gaither…
Married 6.5 Years with 2 Children
What are you doing to ensure your marriage is loving and healthy?
- We pray together every night.
- We make decisions together.
- Once a year (on our anniversary) we openly discuss what’s working and what’s not working and how can we make things better.
How do you keep the passion and excitement alive in your marriage?
- We make the time for “date nights” without the kids.
- We try to vacation once a year without the kids, even if it’s just for a few days.
What makes the difference between having a GREAT marriage and a good marriage?
- A GREAT marriage is one that places God first, your spouse second, and your children third. A GREAT marriage has lots of communication. You pay attention to each other’s physical needs. There is understanding and plenty of patience. It involves loving your spouse unconditionally and putting his/her needs ahead of your own. It takes understanding that you are united in Christ and when one suffers, the other suffers. GREAT marriages endure hard times and allow God to see you through. GREAT marriages have zero tolerance for selfishness and each spouse understands that their life-long partner is an imperfect being.
How important a role does God play in your marriage and family?
- God is the center of our marriage. Without God, we are nothing. We can’t survive in our marriage without the Lord. A marriage with no spiritual life is much easier to break apart. We pray together daily. We attend church on Sundays and most importantly we try to live our lives according to God’s Word. Our family is involved in a Life Group (a small group from our church), where we meet weekly to study the Bible together and fellowship. Teaching our children about God has been a major focus for us since becoming parents.
How do you resolve conflict so that you maintain peace and harmony in your family?
- In dealing with conflicts, we strive to hear one another’s views and concerns in a calm setting. We aim to avoid having selfish motives and do our best to act as one. We respect one another. We also understand that we both have very different ways of dealing with conflict and it’s important for both of us to understand the boundaries. We understand that it’s okay to agree to disagree so we can move on and have harmony. One rule that we have is NEVER go to bed angry at one another. We also strive to not bring up past conflicts during a current debate / argument.
What did you enjoy the most from reading this couple’s insights?
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