During the month of February, we are excited to profile a different couple each day on our Blog site. We have asked each couple to share their answers to specific questions concerning marriage and family. The couples we have invited are at different stages in their marriage… Some have been married for decades while others for a few years. There are even couples who are separated with hopes of reconciling as well as couples currently experiencing a challenging time in their marriage. The one thing all of these couples have in common is their willingness to share “real” insights to help strengthen other marriages, families, and those desiring to be married.
Marriages are NOT all perfect and just because there are challenges doesn’t mean it cannot evolve into a GREAT marriage. Challenges = Growth Opportunities.
Our intention is to create more realistic depictions of marriage…the “real” deal and what it takes to make a marriage work. As you will realize by reading these couples’ insights, GREAT marriages don’t just happen. They take conscious effort and continuous work.
So let us learn from their wisdom. Feel free to chime in and ask questions or even just share your thoughts. After reading today’s insights, post your comment to the question: “What did I learn from today’s insights?” Let’s continue sharing insights. It is our desire to create a dialog so we all learn from others’ experiences and mistakes because this will help create more healthier marriages and families. Join the movement!
Let’s now read some insights from Chip and Eve White…
When I fell in love with my husband, I thought it would be romance and roses forever. We were consumed with our affection and attraction for one another and convinced we were soul mates never to part. Daily phone calls, sweet love notes, thoughtful cards and gifts were a part of our courtship. What started as a friendship culminated into a love story that changed our lives. We are sure God brought us together.
That was 17+ years ago. Many things have changed. We moved across country, changed jobs, had a child, struggled to make ends meet and overcame obstacles so great we thought they could not be conquered. There were times when trust was broken, words were spoken and tears shed, but we always mended our wounds, rebuilding our bonds day by day, until they were stronger than before. And still, in the moments between frantic family life and restful respite, I look at my husband and I am inspired and in love all over again.
Our union is more than just a whim of a courtship with a big fancy wedding party and a white dress, it is a relationship blessed by God. We recognize and respect that it is bigger than both of us and deserves time, effort and mostly courage.
Yes, it takes courage to stay dedicated to a marriage day after day — year after year. In the face of today’s do-as-you-please culture and it’s all-about-me lifestyle, it requires a true focus to block out all the external distractions and focus inwardly on the things that matter. Sometimes what matters is time with our son, enjoying that special relating as a family. Other times we need to be with each other, to remember that once upon a time we had no child and it was just the two of us, and to cherish those memories and our relationship as it has grown. And still other times, though it may sound odd, we need to have the courage to be alone, to seek the solitude of ourselves, finding quiet time with God alone.
There is no magic formula to a perfect marriage. I venture to say there is no perfect marriage. We disagree. We get angry and we have tough times.
However, our relationship with God through Jesus Christ perfects our love and creates in us a heart open to forgiveness, compassion and understanding, and sharing a lifetime with each other. There is comfort in knowing we can rely on one another, pray together, laugh together, cry together and worship together. We are in many ways, as one.
The core of our relationship is summed up in one word — forever. And…love!